Nobody Doesn't Hire Thinkers

[personal flogging session - not meant for consumption by general audience]

I am worthless.  I have no motivation.  There is nothing I want - unused material possessions swallowing me up as it is.

Why live?  Why carry on a big dream if the world is fully of petty squabbles and selfish hoarding?

I have only one body.  I am only one person.  I want only because my social side sympathises with the wants of others.

Death is inevitable.  My family will all die in time, leaving dreams and plans in the hands of others who will also die in time.

What is love if I can't share it with others, ignoring local social/subcultural mores?

If we are one species, why do others spend so much time and energy declaring we are not?

I am conquered by my fears in today's battle with self.  I have lost.  I am captive to the cruelty and shortsightedness inherent in our drive to get ahead at others' costs.

I don't want to see anyone else anymore or hear the un/spoken trails of negative thoughts permeating our planet.  I am burdened with too much personal negativity to hold up much longer.

Some days a couple of beers or glasses of wine or swigs of whiskey smooth over the rough seas pounding against the portholes of my thoughts.

I'm too tired to lift a glass of good cheer today.

Rest.  Peace.  Quiet.

Watch two chickadees looking for "natural" meals in the tree limbs instead of handouts.

Not as many granddaddy longlegs on the window screens this year.

Is there a low-cost place where I can fade away, unaware of the pains and progress of the species to which I was born and raised?

I am a nobody.  Unable to rescue my wife on my own.  Lost and alone.

I don't want to be a helpless dependent.  I want to die with my boots on, walking the woods the last action I remember before a myocardial infarction takes me off of my feet.

I am an old man in thoughts,  if not in body.  Worn out by seeing storylines play out like life is a set of easy scripts to be written by those who have loose connections with the whole species.

Novelty for novelty's sake has lost its novelty.

My fine-feathered friends come to the window expecting a meal from me.  Have I disappointed them, too?

When we run out of exotic metals and other easy-to-manufacture chemicals, who's going to find the Amish, Amazonian nomads and Asian/African desert tribes had it right all along?

Will the majority of our species' members willingly live low-tech lives to send the select into space to preserve a portion of our planet's ecosystems in perpetuity elsewhere?

I can only be an example of myself to myself, choosing a mixture of high-tech and low-tech to live daily.  Should I be more aware of the rare earth elements in my life that are unnecessary for my simple existence, needed more for packaging and sending others to new satellite/planetary bases?

I am a book reader.  A thinker.  Useless in today's fast-paced, high-tech society.  A relic of days gone by.  Where can I go out to pasture and slip away unseen into the hills from whence I came?

My time (and others like mine) has come and gone.  The youngest generation must find the strength and determination to save our species and planet from our selfish desires.  Will they avoid the traps we set to set high-volume consumption examples of ourselves?

If I was born Amish, I wouldn't be here.  Perhaps it's just as well, able to represent more than one alternate lifestyle.  Maybe I can become Amish or something like it before my time is up and leave the sub/urban life to those who don't know better, who aren't aware they're repeating historical civilisation rises/falls, making no more progress than an 18th century farming family makes without all the fuss, worry and stress of reaching for the stars.

I am only one person.  If I won't be one to make sure there is low overhead in how I consume in order to live, then who will?

Today, I don't have the energy to paint a humorous picture that resolves all the conflicts in the world.  I feel humourless, deflated, empty.  Ready to roll up in to a ball and wander away from all this (except, as always, from myself).

Just because I know how the world works and how others twist and turn and manipulate to maintain a constantly-interesting image to the mix of subcultures doesn't mean I want to change how it works or rework it to my advantage.

We are seven billion people, not one.  It's up to you to see how it works, too.  If you want to believe in hatred and pettiness, there are plenty of people to feed that belief.  I no longer want to believe those or feed them, even jokingly.

I want technology turned toward positive solutions so we can use this small window of opportunity to get our species and surrounding ecosystems firmly established on other bodies bouncing around the galaxy.  Island hopping, if you will.

It'll take thousands of years to get us safely far away from this solar system and into other safe zones.  Several waves of settlers will pass away in the process.

Today is the moment to make the decision in y/our life to contribute to that line of reasoning.

I'm just one person, eating a bowl of oatmeal and drinking a cup of tea for breakfast before using a high-power network for expressing my thoughts here.

Maybe it's time to rethink my life.

No "maybe."  It is the moment.

I gave up facebook and linkedin to preserve my quasi-independent mindset.  Time to give up online blogging/browsing, also.

Like watching the chickadees that roam this part of the countryside, there's too much out there that this electronic world doesn't provide, and at a lower cost to the environment (thus leaving more environmental stuff for those who will explore the planets in my/our name).

I'm closing this blog.

Thanks for stopping by.  We'll stay in touch using the other methods, of course.